Psyching her up
My elder daughter has her own mattress which is on the floor next to my bed. The younger one – I didn't even start her off on our bed. I want to start getting the elder girl to sleep in her own room with the maid. She knows her bed is in her room and it's adjoining our bathroom. There's also a bigger bed there so an adult can sleep with her in her room. She knows the room is hers but she doesn't want to sleep there yet. So we've been psyching her up by asking her about her bed or to get things from her room. She knows it's her territory but she doesn't want to sleep there. I've been telling her that she'll have to sleep in her own room from her next birthday. - Maznita Mokhtar, mother of two girls aged one and three years old

Stand your ground
My daughter still sometimes sleeps in my bed (embarrassingly) however, I don’t think it’s a bad thing as it’s quite common with the Indian/Caribbean communities (her father’s parents are from Jamaica) where it’s not a habit that’s frowned upon. In fact it helps with the mother/child (or grandma/child) bond. Apart from that, when it was time to train Saffy to sleep in her own bed, I had to stand my ground with the whining/tantrums which I must say can be very trying for any parent especially after a hard day’s work! – Indira Ellis, mother of one girl aged 12, from England

Set the pattern early
They've all slept in their own beds from the time they were infants. It's because I operate better on a full night's sleep and so do they. The only time they sleep in my bed is when they're ill. We never really celebrated it with any type of occasion. I would respond to them when they cried – I would go to their room, pat their back or give them a bottle of water, but I wouldn't give them milk. So they developed a pattern – seven hours at a time or eight hours at a time. Now all my children go to bed at 7pm and wake up at 7am. The rule now is that you don't have to sleep at 7pm if you're not tired but the lights are out and you have to play a quiet game. You're not allowed to hit each other, you can't read, you can't stay up with the lights on. The lights have to be off. We never break the rule, not even on vacation. – Melissa Lozano, mother of four children from 14 months to 5 ½ years