POSITIVE PARENTING
By CHEONG SAU KUAN
Children are blessed with the innate ability to learn. However, for some, it is a bigger challenge than you might think.
YOU are preparing your child for her first day of school. You are both excited and looking forward to this learning journey. You happily send her off to school. However, as time goes by, the enthusiasm begins to wane. She returns home from school everyday, frustrated and irritated. Her test results are below average. You have tried everything to help her improve. You hire tutors and buy her all the revision books that you can find, but nothing changes. Does this sound familiar? If it does, then your child may have a learning disability.
So, what exactly is a learning disability?
A child with dyslexia (reading disability) has difficulty understanding the relationship between sounds and letters or may be unable to grasp the meaning of words, phrases, and paragraphs.
A person who has a learning disability has a neurological disorder that affects how information is received, processed and/or communicated in the brain. He has difficulty processing information received meaningfully because he sees, hears and understands things differently from other people. This manifests into difficulties in understanding or using spoken or written language, doing mathematical calculations, and directing attention, which will impede his ability to learn how to read, write, or calculate.
Contrary to popular belief, a learning disability is not indicative of an individual’s intelligence level. They merely have trouble expressing their abilities and the information that they hold in their brain.
Learning disabilities may begin to occur in very young children, but this may not be apparent until the child starts formal education, which is when conclusive diagnoses are often made.
Parents must pay close attention to developmental milestones in their toddlers as the inability to achieve some of these milestones may be an indication of a learning disability. This is because most of the time, the child will look perfectly “normal”, just like other children. The common problems mainly encountered are found in reading, writing, and arithmetic.
Reading disability – Dyslexia refers to a dysfunction in the process where meaning from written text is extracted and constructed from. The individual may have difficulty understanding the relationship between sounds and letters or may be unable to grasp the meaning of words, phrases, and paragraphs.
Individuals who have dyslexia may struggle to recognise or pronounce written words, confuse letters such as b and d, have limited vocabulary, and remember very little of what they read.
Writing disability – Known also as dysgraphia, individuals with this disability have difficulty putting their ideas into written form. People with dysgraphia may present writings that are filled with mistakes (ie spelling, punctuation, etc), have irregular shapes and sizes, difficult to decipher, and have poor spatial planning.
Mathematics disability – Mathematics in this sense, refers to arithmetic abilities. Commonly referred to as dyscalculia, individuals who have a mathematics disability have difficulty understanding numbers and arithmetical concepts. For example, they may find it difficult to perform simple addition and subtraction tasks, memorise mathematical facts, and understand arithmetic terms and symbols.
Additionally, some may even encounter problems with time and understanding the concepts related to time, such as days and weeks.
Learning disabilities may manifest differently in individuals, showing different combinations and degrees of difficulty. In fact, it is common for individuals to have more than one form of learning disability.
As parents, what role do you play?
A learning disability is a life-long challenge that cannot be cured, but the individual eventually learns to adapt to the disability. The most crucial step in maximising the potential of a child with learning disability is to ensure that he gets an accurate diagnosis and be given effective intervention as early as possible. This is not only important to ensure that he will be able to cope with the disability, but also make positive adjustments in his life.
However, success in managing the disability hinges not only on early intervention, but also on the way parents behave and what they do. Read on to see how you, as parents, can make all the difference.
1. Get an expert opinion
If you suspect that your child may have a learning disability, consult an expert. Obtain advice from your clinician on options to assist your child. Impulsive decisions on intervention programmes may not benefit your child. Talk to your clinician to find the most suitable intervention programme for your child.
Keep informed on new developments, intervention programmes, and educational techniques that may benefit your child. Your knowledge may not only help you decide which technique will best suit your child, it will also enable you to work effectively with your child’s therapist, tutor, or school to guarantee the best outcome for your child.
2. Encourage healthy emotional habits
Children with learning disabilities may often feel powerless, inadequate, and frustrated due to all the challenges they face. Provide a positive medium for them to express themselves, such as expression through arts and sports. Styles of expression varies from child to child depending on their area of interest. Listen to them when they talk and provide them with the social support they need.
3. Promote self-esteem
In the early years, having a learning disability may predispose a child to more criticisms and failures, which will greatly affect their self-esteem. Enhance your child’s self-esteem by focusing on the positives more than the negatives. Work with him to develop his strengths and passions as it may help him notice and feel confident about what he can do.
4. Stay optimistic
All challenges can be overcome, as they are not roadblocks in your child’s life. Do not feel discouraged by your child’s condition as it distracts you from providing your child with emotional, educational, and moral support. Additionally, your child will tend to follow your lead and learn to embrace all the challenges with a positive outlook.
Parents should not be disheartened over the fact that their child has a learning disability. Though their child may struggle in one area of learning, this should not be generalised as they may excel in other skills or areas. Always re-member that life success is more important than school success.
Cheong Sau Kuan is a clinical psychologist. This article is courtesy of the Malaysian Paediatric Association for the Positive Parenting Programme. For further information, please visit www.mypositiveparenting.org. The information provided is for educational and communication purposes only and should not be construed as personal medical advice. Information provided in this article is not intended to replace, supplant or augment a consultation with a health professional regarding a reader’s own medical care.